Fear came wrapped in a package and arrived C.O.D.<\/h1>\n

 <\/p>\n

“The Package Came C.O.D.”<\/h2>\n

by Heidi Connolly<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The package came C.O.D.<\/p>\n

The delivery guy said it was for me<\/p>\n

I signed for it, opened it, put it on, claimed it<\/p>\n

I owned it then; it sure owned me;<\/p>\n

I could have thrown it down<\/p>\n

Kicked it to the floor<\/p>\n

I could have sent it back<\/p>\n

And slammed the door;<\/p>\n

I could have just said no<\/p>\n

I could have stood my ground<\/p>\n

I should have watched it leave<\/p>\n

Sent it back where it belonged;<\/p>\n

\u2019Cause when you live your life in denial<\/p>\n

Of who you really are<\/p>\n

The light you hold inside you<\/p>\n

Sounds like whispers from afar;<\/p>\n

You learn of love and how it hurts<\/p>\n

For reasons of remorse<\/p>\n

It churns and gnaws inside of you<\/p>\n

And charts a deceptive course;<\/p>\n

When fear is allowed to lead the way<\/p>\n

The truth is buried alive<\/p>\n

Without a chance to breathe and grow<\/p>\n

With no chance to survive;<\/p>\n

When doubt grows into hatred<\/p>\n

It traps you like a snare<\/p>\n

The burden of a thought<\/p>\n

That’s really not ours to bear;<\/p>\n

If you let it, it will cut you<\/p>\n

Your wings clipped in despair<\/p>\n

Every minute a sad reflection<\/p>\n

Everyday another correction;<\/p>\n

When the package came COD<\/p>\n

And the delivery guy said it was for me<\/p>\n

My life went driving down the street<\/p>\n

I lived a lie in defeat;<\/p>\n

But now I keep only what is mine<\/p>\n

Whatever arrives must be divine<\/p>\n

When it\u2019s for me it\u2019s whole, intact<\/p>\n

This is a promise and a pact;<\/p>\n

I close the door on everything else<\/p>\n

I send it back much blessed<\/p>\n

For only in the vibration of love<\/p>\n

Is fear ever laid to rest;<\/p>\n

I lift the veil of denial<\/p>\n

I lift the weight of pain<\/p>\n

I become the one I\u2019m meant to be<\/p>\n

Like a desert freed by rain.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I wrote this song in 2004 and \u201ccame upon\u201d it today as I was searching for another file. You might call it a coincidence, but I would much rather land on the side of synchronicity, if for no other reason that it feels good when I do.<\/p>\n

Yesterday I posted a poem by Becky Hemsley. Today I found my song. Notwithstanding my lack of songwriting ability and without knowing Becky\u2019s intention for certain, it seems to me that we are talking about similar ideas about accepting who we are. As HSPs. As Highly Sensitive People. As individuals. As humans. As creative souls who live and breathe and identify and share and grow and touch and feel and respond and love and all the rest of it\u2026the whole messy enchilada.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What amazes me is that I wrote this in 2004, not 2012 after my husband died or 2014 when I began hearing from him. Not all these years after discovering that my HSP-ness was directly related to my psychic and mediumship abilities and being witness to my own growth as an author.<\/p>\n

I had to ask myself: If I didn\u2019t know then what I know now, where did the words come from? Was I already channeling, if you want to call it that, my higher self? Had I entered some kind of 5^{th<\/sup>-dimensional reality or parallel universe? Had I time traveled?<\/p>\n}

I really don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n

Yet here I sit before you today (well, before my computer writing to you) and feeling every word of this song.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I have lifted the veil of denial<\/strong><\/p>\n

I have lifted the weight of pain<\/strong><\/p>\n

I am becoming the one I\u2019m meant to be<\/strong><\/p>\n

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