This morning I had a lengthy conversation with a fellow gym rat. Not that I’m much of a rat…more of a mouse, really. But still. Anyway, seems a dear friend of his from the past, someone he’d lost touch with the last few years yet someone he’d appreciated and revered, had died. This guy at the gym, let’s call him Stew, was obviously experiencing sadness, and disappointment in himself for not having stayed in contact because “now it’s too late.”

I’m an HSP with certain abilities, so it’s up to me.

As an intuitive medium, I was already connecting with Stew’s friend “Jim,” seeing him in my mind’s eye as the powerfully built former linebacker I would soon discover he was (from Stew’s later description), and a man with a heart of gold. Although Stew knows that I “talk to dead people,” we’d never gotten into it before during our brief convos passing from Stairmaster to elliptical. You know, friendly at the gym, but not that friendly. His discomfort (okay, fine, skepticism), apparent by the immediate sliding away of the eyes whenever the topic of my “work” came up, was clear enough. And, since I wasn’t there to disturb his chi or anything, I’d always let it go. But now, Stew had tears in his eyes and I wanted to help. Jim was asking me to help.

Should you share the messages you get? Share what you know, feel, see, hear?

I figured, well, what the heck. Spirit never steers me wrong. I had nothing to lose. Oh so gently I posited to Stew that it might help to know that Jim was feeling pretty good on the Other Side, at ease. That he knows his family misses him, but his death was what he chose because it was easier for everyone than it would have been had he hung around any longer—that a long illness toward death would have been even more painful for everyone. Jim was suggesting that Stew might want to think about writing a note to Jim’s wife to express Stew’s love for this kind-hearted man who thought as highly of Stew as Stew did of him.

Spirit will never guide you wrong.

This afternoon as I sit at my desk waiting for a client to arrive, I keep thinking about Stew and Jim and about the delicate space that exists around sharing when you aren’t at all sure how your sharing will be received. When my phone pinged I was a little surprised to see a text from Stew. We aren’t texting buddies, and in fact had never exchanged more than phone numbers. Still, I felt as if I’d been waiting for the message. Attached were two images, one of Jim as a young sportsman and one of him a couple of years prior to his recent passing. Stew, without admitting to any kind of belief around Spirit, had found a way to let me know, and let Jim know, that connecting with me had connected him to Jim…and that the connection had transmuted some of the ache he’d been holding due to his own guilt over letting the friendship fall by the wayside into a less troubled space. And Spirit, in this case, Jim, was assuring me I’d done the right thing by speaking up with love in my heart.

Miracle or not?

I call this a mini-miracle. I know, I know. Many might, even reasonably, disagree. I mean, what’s so miraculous about someone who absolutely positively doesn’t believe in “stuff like that” feeling potentially comforted by something someone like me or you says? Someone who, just perhaps, understands loss, death, dying, and matters of Spirit and is willing to express that in a moment of need? I’ll tell you.

Turns out, like with everything else, it’s all a matter of perspective. I never saw miracles in my life because I didn’t believe in them. I didn’t believe in them because I had a definition of what they were that couldn’t possibly be supported by “real life.” I also had a long history of hiding what I saw, felt, heard, sensed, knew, and believed when it might have rocked the proverbial boat of reason.

The thing is that keeping quiet is no longer an option. I want to share the loving messages I receive.

• I want to express my truth.
• I want to be authentic.
• I want to feel relaxed and in alignment.

None of which I can do or be if I’m hiding who I am. An HSP, a Highly Sensitive Person, and a person with unique talents and abilities to share.

What are you hiding that is begging to come out of the closet?

The post Coming Out of the HSP Closet first appeared on Elevate Your HSP-ness!.

Thought versus Feeling: The great dichotomy

The great dichotomy—and paradox—around being an HSP is that you feel everything, but when it comes time to meditate you find yourself so stuck in your mind’s meanderings that you can’t let go and do what you do so beautifully: feel intensely.

Today we’re going to talk about the actual process behind this dichotomy and what to do about it.

Premise: “I’m too sensitive. I feel everything.”

Okay, so you’re an HSP, a very highly sensitive person. Which, like I said, basically means you feel everything. But it also means you tend to overthink everything. It’s a constant back-and-forth that keeps you tightly wound in insecurity, indecision, and, often, irreconcilable conflict.

Supposition: “Meditation is too hard.”

Meditation is one, if not the, best way to rewire the way you move through life. It can be difficult for the very same dichotomy stated above. The key is to start thinking about the difference between feeling, as in emotion, and feeling, as the somatic sensations caused in the body. Otherwise, you can feel like a big blockhead!

The example:

“I’m upset.” Being upset is an emotional state, an emotion you can name and feel on that emotional level.

“I feel upset.” Your heart is pounding in your chest because you feel upset. The heart’s pounding is your body’s somatic response to whatever you tell yourself you’re experiencing: the sensation.

Identifying the difference and then isolating whatever sensation in your body is taking place is what can help guide you into leaving the mind out of the picture.

In your head, the conversation (at least, if you’re anything like me) can go something like this.

“Okay, I’m trying to meditate. I’m trying to quiet the mind. Stop my thoughts. All the things that everyone says to do. But I can’t. I feel fidgety and my mind is hopping from one thought to the next. Why can’t I stop the thoughts? Why can’t I “focus on my breath” and “relax”? Why is it so easy for other people? I give up.”

I’ll tell you a little secret. One reason why it feels so difficult is exactly because you’re such a brilliant HSP! The very HSP-ness qualities that make you experience everything so strongly are the same qualities that have your mind spinning in response.

Shifting the conversation

The only way I’ve found to shift this conundrum is by focusing on all the things my body is feeling while my mind is carrying on doing what it’s doing. To remind myself minute-to-minute, second-to-second, what sensation is going on in my body as I’m busily labeling, thinking, directing, mulling, whining, reliving conversations, and so on.

Shifting into conscious awareness

Whenever I become aware that I’m having the thought I’m having, I think, “Oh, I’m not meditating. I’m having a thought. Oops.”

“Let’s see. What am I feeling in relation to that thought? What is my response to that thought?”

• The Thought: “I’m remembering the argument I had yesterday with a friend.”
• The Emotion: “I feel angry. I feel like I want to cry (or scream or….)”
• The Sensation: “What is the sensation in my body? Can I isolate it? Is it diffuse throughout? Oh, yeah. My chest feels hard and tight and I feel sick to my stomach.”

Going into your body (Leaving Your Mind Behind)

Already, simply by becoming consciously aware of this process has brought you from 100% mind chatter “into your body.”

I always wondered what people meant by “being in your body.” I believe this is exactly what it means.

To go from a thought state to an emotional state is not enough. You need to take one step further to bring you into your somatic body, which then allows you (invites you) to truly FEEL sensationally rather than emotionally. Not thinking about what I’m feeling, but actually feeling it. Whether it’s tingling or breathing in and out or heaviness or lightness or a fast heartbeat or anything else.

This is where the rubber meets the road, guys. This is where your mind takes a breather. This is where your ability to meditate takes off.

Hallelujah!

The post Meditation: The most powerful way to reach your true self. first appeared on Elevate Your HSP-ness!.